Have you ever stared at the ceiling until three in the morning, unable to sleep, replaying the words of a fight you had with someone? Or have you ever been stuck in an argument with someone from whom you couldn't escape, feeling as though time had simply stood still? We have all likely experienced these long, heavy hours caused by relationship conflicts.

This happens because of the "Emotional Clock," which causes us to perceive time as moving fast or slow based on our feelings. Compare five minutes of arguing with someone to five hours of dining out with friends, those five minutes will feel significantly longer. These are the kinds of minutes and hours we should aim to minimize in our lives.

How the Emotional Clock Works

When you have a problem or an argument with someone, your brain automatically activates a response system to handle the conflict. In that moment, your attention becomes hyper-focused on every detail, from your surroundings to the internal pressure within your body. You might even find yourself noticing every single tick of the clock's second hand. This is why time feels stretched and heavy. Essentially, you are losing precious moments of your life.

Unnecessary Conflicts

When people argue, if they are debating to find a mutual solution to a problem, there might still be a positive result worth the time spent. However, when arguments are fueled by ego, intentional personal attacks, or looking for trouble unnecessarily, it is a total waste of time that creates those long, heavy hours. The outcome of such conflicts almost always leads to something negative.

How to Avoid These Long, Heavy Hours

1. The "5-Year, 5-Minute" Rule

When you find yourself in a conflict, ask yourself: Will this issue still matter five years from now? If the answer is no, do not spend more than five minutes arguing about it.

2. Be the First to Apologize

Apologizing is not about admitting defeat. It is about reclaiming your valuable time and protecting the other person from experiencing those long, heavy hours as well. It creates a "win-win" situation for both parties.

3. Remember: Ego and Peace Are Inversely Proportional

Whenever a problem arises, remember that if your desire to win (your ego) is strong, you are about to lose your peace of mind. Winning an argument might mean losing both your precious time and the person you value.

No matter who you are, we each only get 24 hours a day, and we cannot add more. However, we can choose how those hours feel and how much value they hold. We hope you will be mindful to avoid the heavy hours caused by conflict and instead possess days filled with happiness.